Happy Saint Patrick's Day!, March 17, 2017

May you have the hindsight to know where you've been,

The foresight to know where you are going,

And the insight to know when you have gone too far.

~Old Irish Blessing

Happy Saint Patrick's Day Today! Best wishes to those of you of Irish descent, which includes most who are in our family tree. The Irishness of us Shepards and Gowers is one of the best things about us!

Happy Birthday to Kaylan! Birthday wishes go out this Sunday, March 19, to Kaylan Shepard who turns 18 this month! Her picture is on the right. With her auburn hair, green coat and beautiful smile, she looks very Irish and could be our family's poster person for Saint Patrick's Day! 

Kaylan is the daughter of my cousin Dane Shepard and his wife Cindy of Blanchard, Oklahoma. Born in California in 1999, Kaylan has spent most of her life in Oklahoma. She is the last of the 21 Great Grandchildren of William and Bura Davis Shepard.

Finetta Dearien Shannon. One of the most important family strains of Irish descendants in our family tree is the lineage belonging to my Grandmother Nola Shannon Gower (1903-2004). I have written about Grandma Gower's celtic ancestry numerous times in this blog, including here, here and here.

Grandma Gower's mother Finetta Dearien Shannon was a native Arkansan who experienced a difficult past that has been remembered through the years and is still remembered today because it was so troubling. In view of the conflict we have been having in our family these days, it might be helpful to take a detailed look at this part of our family history. 

My Great Grandmother Finetta Dearien Shannon (1861-1960) was born 156 years ago this week. She was the child of Augustus Marvin Dearien and Mr. Dearien's own step-daughter, a teenager named Roena Norton. Finetta's father Augustus Dearien compounded his grave error by causing the disappearance of his step-daughter Roena after she had given birth to his child. 

Sam Shannon and Finetta Dearien Shannon

We don't know exactly what became of Roena. Not long after Finetta was born, Roena simply disappeared, never to be heard from again. One family legend has it that her step-father caused her death in some famous local caves, probably the nearby Blanchard Springs Caverns. Another legend says that she was simply taken away never to return. In recent years I have tried to locate Roena in the genealogical records available to me from the mid 19th century, but to no avail. 

Roena's daughter Finetta was raised by her Grandmother Elizabeth Mitchell Dearien and her unscrupulous father Augustus Dearien. It was an unpleasant situation that caused a great amount of contention, heartache and conflict and was one of the most embarrassing domestic developments ever in our family. 

The US Census records for the period from 1830 to 1880 tell an interesting story about Finetta and her incestuous father Augustus Dearien.

The 1830 US Census shows the family of 16 year old Augustus Dearien living in Virginia, in a household that reported owning 4 slaves. It may have been in that household that the teenager Augustus Dearien learned that some people were not to be valued, but were simply to serve the needs of the head of the household.

The 1860 US Census (taken 9 months before Finetta was born) lists Augustus and Elizabeth Dearien and their family living in Richwoods Township, Stone County, Arkansas. The child Roena J. is listed as being 20 years old (which may have been inaccurate). The Census was taken in September, 1860, just about the time Roena became pregnant with Finetta.

snippet from the 1870 U.S. Census

The 1870 US Census (a snippet from which is seen above) indicates that the Deariens were living in Sylamore Township in Stone County, Arkansas at the time. One of the children of this family is named "Mitchell Dearien" and was 8 years old, which would have been Finetta's age. This may be a reference to Finetta. The other family members are listed with their ages. Could it be the family gave 8 year old Finetta the name "Mitchell"? Mitchell was Finetta's Grandmother's maiden name, and was the last name given to Finetta in the 1880 Census, 10 years later (see next paragraph). 

snippet from the 1880 U.S. Census

The 1880 US Census (a snippet from which is seen above) shows the Deariens still living in Sylamore Township in Stone County, Arkansas. This listing only shows father Augustus M., mother Lucinda, and one child, 18 year old "Vinettie Mitchel." Vinettie is surely a reference to Finetta, whose grandmother's maiden name was Mitchell. The information given to the Census taker was that this 18 year old was not one of the children but was simply a "boarder." Finetta is not even afforded the privilege of being a member of the family!

It is a sordid and tragic story that comes together when looking at the history of Finetta and her incestuous father. It was a situation that made for conflict, unhappiness and embarrassment, much of which has continued through the years. But the good news is that the ill-born Finetta went on to make a good life for herself with husband Sam Shannon, in the very community where she was born and raised. The last of the 9 children born to Finetta and Sam was my grandmother Nola Shannon Gower. 

This historical survey in the last few posts of conflicts in our family has been interesting to say the least. Whether it helps in dealing with our present squabble remains to be seen. If nothing else it reminds us that we are all too human and susceptible to dissension. The fact of the matter is that conflicts sometime come our way, the important thing is how we choose to deal with them.
- - -
Steve Shepard

A Relentless Hope, January 13, 2016

Success is to be measured

not so much by the position one has reached in life

as by the obstacles which have been overcome.

~Booker T. Washington

Happy Anniversary to Jeff and Kim Clark! This coming Monday, January 18 is the 9th wedding anniversary of Kim Boyd Ortiz-Clark and Jeff Clark. Kim is a cousin of mine and one of the Grandchildren of William and Bura Shepard. 

Kim and husband Jeff were married in La Jolla, California in 2007 but have lived their entire married life in Blue Springs, Missouri. Best wishes to Kim and Jeff for a wonderful anniversary!

Remembering Samuel and Finetta Shannon. On this day in 1881, two of my Great Grandparents were married in Stone County, Arkansas. They are one more couple in our family tree who chose to marry in the dead of winter. It was undoubtedly cold in the hills of Northern Arkansas on that Thursday, January 13, when my Great Grandfather Samuel Pickens Shannon and Great Grandmother Finetta Clementine Dearien tied the knot. At the time their families were living in the small farming communities of  Sylamore and Timbo, 13 miles west of Mountain View, Arkansas.

I never knew either one of them personally. Sam died before I was born. And although Finetta lived until 1960, I lived in California and never had the opportunity to meet her. But we do know quite a bit about the lives of both of them. The historical record is kind to us in this regard. Both Finetta and Sam had amazing, yet tragic childhoods in their own ways.

Tragic Childhoods. Sam was the 7th of the 9 children of David and Peggy Shannon. Of those 9 children, 2 died in their first year. The other 7 lived in rural Louisiana during the Civil War. Their father died in that conflict when Sam was just 5 years old, leaving mother Peggy and her 7 children in poverty in the post war South, a terrible fate in itself. Fortunately Peggy's brothers from Stone County, Arkansas came to the rescue and moved Peggy and her fatherless children, to live near them in Northern Arkansas. Though Sam's mother was a young Civil War widow, at least he had the stability of a larger family that cared for him, his mother, and his siblings.

Finetta's childhood was also very difficult, but for different reasons. Born in Stone County, Arkansas she was the child of an abusive stepfather Gus Dearien who had molested his own stepdaughter, Finetta's mother Roena Norton. In those days Finetta was considered "illegitimate", which carried a burdensome stigma. She was raised in the hills south of Mountain View, Arkansas by her biological father and her Grandmother Liza Mitchell Dearien.

A Relentless Hope for the Future. So on that Thursday, 135 years ago, when Finetta and Sam married, they came together with lots of painful history, but a relentless hope for the future that led them to a wonderful life with one another. They bore 9 children, the last of whom was my Grandmother Nola Shannon Gower. I remember Grandma Gower talking about the home in which she was raised: a place where hard work was valued, where dirt floors were common, where the most was made of the simplest things, where family life was respected, where long dusty walks to church and community was normal, and where allegiance to the local Baptist Church was important.

It may have been in that little Baptist Church in their local community that their wedding occurred. Samuel was 22 and Finetta was 19 when they said their vows and began a journey of love that would last 49 years. Sam died at 72 in 1930, while Finetta lived till 1960 when she died just 3 months short of her 100th birthday. They are buried next to each other in Gray Cemetery, a humble, at times hidden, family burial site off Happy Hallow Road within walking distance of Timbo.

From painful, humble beginnings, they lived a resilient life, overcoming great odds and leaving a wonderful family legacy. On this anniversary of their wedding, may God bless the memory of Sam and Finetta Shannon and their place in the history of our family.
- - -
Steve Shepard

Living Well Is the Best Revenge, May 5, 2015

Living well is the best revenge.

~George Herbert

Shepard Family Reunion 2015. A family reunion is being planned for this summer on Saturday, August 22 at the home of Patrick and Nicole Shepard in the Seattle suburb of Bothell, Washington. All family and friends are invited to attend. More details will be forthcoming as the date draws near.

One Remarkable Mother. During this week leading up to Mother's Day I would like to feature a person in our family's past whose was a remarkable mother. She was not remarkable because of her grace or beauty, her charm or her ability to embody the best qualities of motherhood as we understand it today. I don't know her well enough to say any of those things about her with any certainty. I consider her a remarkable woman because of what we DO know about her, which is significant, even though she lived her entire life in the 19th century.

Her name was Elizabeth (Liza) Lucinda Mitchell, and she was the Great Grandmother of my Grandmother Nola Shannon Gower. Here is her lineage:

• Elizabeth (Liza) Lucinda Mitchell (1817-1881), who married Andy Norton (1820-?) then Gus Dearien (1817-1900)
• Roena Norton (1841-?) 
• Finetta Dearien Shannon (1861-1960), who married Samuel Pickens Shannon (1858-1930)
• Nola Shannon Gower (1903-2004), who married Leroy Gower (1899-1974)
• Maida Gower Shepard (b. 1924), who married Eugene Shepard (1921-2003)
• Steve Shepard (b. 1948), who married Cynthia Harris (b. 1948)
• Nathan Shepard (b. 1977), who married Chenda Sou (b. 1980)
• Preslea Shepard (b. 2010)

Elizabeth Mitchell was born in South Carolina in 1817 to Henry and Abba Mitchell, but as a young woman moved westward with her family. They lived for short periods of time in Georgia and then Tennessee before settling in Stone County, Arkansas where she lived most of the rest of her life. Stone County is where both my Gower grandparents were born and raised.

About 1840 Elizabeth married a man named Andy Norton near Mountain View, Arkansas, and by him had one daughter, Roena Norton. That marriage ended after just a few years and she then married a man named Gus Dearien and with him had two other children, David and Mary. One of the uglier events of our family history occurred when Elizabeth's second husband Gus Dearien had a child by his stepdaughter Roena Norton. He then added insult to injury by causing Roena's disappearance, but kept the child Finetta, and raised her in their home. I have written about that previously in this family blog and do not need to dwell on it here. This post is more about Elizabeth Mitchell Dearien, mother of Rowena and grandmother of Finetta Clementine Dearien. (See picture above of Finetta and her daughter Nola.)

Living well is the best revenge. Despite the dysfunction of the Dearien family, Elizabeth seems to have made a decent life for herself and her children. Her first child Finetta actually created a wonderful family of her own when she married Samuel Pickens Shannon. With him she bore 9 children, the last one being my Grandmother Nola Shannon Gower. Elizabeth and Finetta each had plenty of justification for being bitter and resentful of Gus' unscrupulous actions. Instead Elizabeth illustrates the truth of the saying of George Herbert, "Living well is the best revenge." 

She had all the reason in the world to get back at her husband. Instead she made the best of what came her way. She was a remarkable woman of extraordinary fortitude who endured to the end, and made of her life and her family the best she could under the circumstances. Obviously the sparsely populated hills of Northern Arkansas in the mid 19th century (during and after the Civil War) was no place for a woman to expect much justice from the domestic wrongdoing she had experienced.

So she continued her life with Mr. Dearien for 40 years and died at 64 in Timbo, near Mountain View, Arkansas in the fall of 1881. She is buried in Blue Mountain Cemetery in Timbo alongside her husband. Here is a link to her her online grave page. The picture above on the left is the headstone for L.L. Dearien (Liza Lucinda) and her husband A. M. Dearien (Augustus Marvin) in Blue Mountain Cemetery.

The story of Elizabeth Mitchell Dearien is a sobering reminder of how Mother's Day must be more than a sentimental celebration of charming women. It is also a remembrance of women who had a difficult time in life but endured remarkably despite the injustices that came their way. As we approach Mother's Day 2015, I suggest to you that Elizabeth Lucinda Mitchell Dearien is one such person, a remarkable mother who deserves remembering and celebrating.

William and Bura Shepard's 100th Anniversary. New this week on William and Bura Shepard's anniversary page is a musical-photo presentation of William Shepard and Bura Davis Shepard with family and friends over the years. Select this link to visit their Anniversary Page and view the new photo presentation. 
- - -
Steve Shepard

The Good News From a Tragic Tale, Sept 16, 2014

You are no longer strangers and aliens,

but members of the household of God.

~Paul (Eph. 2.19)

In this post I want to follow up on my last two posts and share the good news from the sordid, tragic tale of an unwanted stepchild and her thoughtless parents. The only child of my GG Grandmother Roena Norton (1840-?) was Finetta Dearien Shannon (1861-1960). As unfairly as Roena and Finetta were treated by their own family, there was redemption in this unfortunate story.

Roena and Finetta, Part III. Roena's daughter Finetta was born March 14, 1861. In her infancy she suffered the loss of her young mother, probably at the hands of Finetta's father Augustus Dearien. Finetta was raised in the home of her father and her grandmother Elizabeth, in Sylmore Township, 10 miles west of Mountain View, Arkansas. This family appears in both the 1870 and 1880 US Census for Sylamore. The Census records also show the two biological children of Augustus and Elizabeth: David Dearien, born 1849, and Mary E. Dearien, born 1854.

In both Census records there are strong indications that the Deariens did not want to acknowledge their offspring Finetta as part of their family. Truth be told, Augustus and Elizabeth must have been in a quandry as to what to say about young Finetta, who was the daughter of Augustus' stepchild Roena Norton. In the 1870 Census 8 year old Finetta is listed as a Dearien, but her actual first name Finetta is not listed. Instead she is reported to have the first name Mitchell, which, interestingly, was Finetta's grandmother's maiden name. It is hard to decipher what was going on here. Were the Census takers simply mistaken, getting vague or misleading information from the family? One can certainly imagine the Deariens not being very forthcoming about this child of an abusive, incestuous stepfather.

10 years later, in 1880, the Deariens have to deal with those pesky Census takers again. This time the Deariens do report Finetta's actual first name, but they say that her last name is Mitchell. (This illustrates the problem with lying and deceiving -- it is hard to keep the story straight.) And, as I mentioned in my previous post, the Deariens don't claim the now 19 year old Finetta as their own, but report that she is just a "boarder" in their house, suggesting that she is not a member of their family.

Finetta received a bum deal in many ways in her early life. Fathered by her mother's stepfather, her mother was cruelly taken from her and disappeared when Finetta was just a baby. Then her parents refuse to claim her, giving her a various assortment of names and descriptions in a pathetic attempt to distance themselves from her. Today there are some legal protections for children treated so poorly, but in the hill country of mid-19th century Arkansas, children were often at the mercy of parents like the Deariens.

The Dramatic Change of 1881. After being treated so badly by her father and grandmother, who dealt with their own guilt and shame by refusing to claim her as their own, things changed dramatically for Finetta in 1881. At 19 years old Finetta and a 21 year old neighbor named Samuel Pickens Shannon claim each other. On January 14 they were united in marriage in Timbo, Arkansas. Finally she is free from a family that doesn't want her, and has a family where she belongs, a family of her own making, a family that she and Sam lovingly create.

Between 1882 and 1903 Sam and Finetta brought 9 children into the world, establishing a large household that reflected their honest, caring approach to life. My grandmother Nola Agnes Shannon (1903-2004) was the last of those 9 children. (See second picture, from around 1930, of young Nola Shannon Gower on the left next to mother Finetta and 2 other daughters).

I knew Nola for the last 56 years of her life. The way she spoke of her family of origin suggests that they were decent, loving people. They had their tough times, of course. Nola was always clear about that. But if my grandmother's comments were any indication, Sam and Finetta produced a family of love and respect. It was a far cry from the dysfunction of the home of Augustus and Elizabeth Dearien.

How did Finetta respond to the gross mistreatment of her and her mother Roena by their own family? In the best way she knew how. By creating a warm, loving, respectful family of her own, a family based on trust and honesty, not abuse and deception. For Finetta, there could be no greater act of redemption.

Elizabeth Mitchell Dearien, Finetta's grandmother who raised her, died October 3, 1881, 9 months after Sam and Finetta were married. See first picture (above) of the grave of A. M. (Augustus Marvin) Dearien and L.L. (Liza Lucinda) Dearien in Blue Mountain Cemetery, Timbo, Arkansas.

Elizabeth (Liza) did not live long enough to see the birth of Mary Ann Shannon, the firstborn child of Sam and Finetta in February, 1882. Augustus did however. He lived until 1900, and saw all but one of the 9 children of Sam and Finetta come into the world (see third picture from 1946 of Finetta Dearien Shannon, right, with oldest daughter Mary Ann Shannon Everidge, and grandson Earnest Everidge). The creation of a large, wholesome family was the best response that could be made to the cruel treatment of the Deariens. Surely the blood of Roena cries from the earth uttering sounds of satisfaction.
- - -
Steve Shepard