Happy Siblings Day! April 10, 2018

Our paths may change as life goes along
But the bond between us remains ever strong.

Today is Siblings Day, one of the lesser holidays on the calendar, but one that most definitely deserves its place. It is undervalued as far as I am concerned. Siblings are important, even though they sometimes live at a distance, even if our relationships do grow old over time, even if we have our differences. Despite all that it behooves us to honor our siblings.

Gary, me, Jerry, Darrell, Barbara and Russ

I am grateful for my siblings. For Gary, Darrell, Barbara, and Russ, and for Jerry Clark. And for the memory of my departed sister Linda. I am grateful to each of them for our shared history, for our family ties, for the memories we have from years passed. I am grateful for the happy times that brought us together and the sad times that also brought us together, even though we would never have wished for it to have happened that way. I am also grateful for the ways our relationships have evolved over the years, sometimes in ways that deepen our bonds, other times in ways that challenge the very fabric of our family.

Maida and her sister Vicki

But most of all I am particularly grateful for the ways my siblings have responded to needs of our dear mother Maida Shepard in these last years of her life. My life is so much better for having my siblings in my life. But most of all, mom is blessed by the care given to her by her children, my siblings, who give the best of themselves to her.

Long Time Siblings. Siblings are usually the people we have known longer in life than anyone else, except our parents. In our larger family, among those who have been siblings a very long time are my 93 year old mother Maida Gower Shepard and her 84 year old sister Vicki Gower Johnston. These days Maida and Vicki live a distance from each other, with Maida living in Washington, and Vicki living in Arizona. But for most of their lives they lived near enough to one another to keep their relationship close. They stay in contact even today as best they can despite the limitations of their advanced years. They have been siblings since 1933, nearly 85 years. This second picture shows Maida and Vicki just a few years ago in Maida's home in Anacortes, Washington.

Sisters Juanita and Paula, with Cindy on the left

But the most remarkable set of siblings among us is my wife Cindy's mother Paula Hicks Harris and her sister Juanita Hicks Eeds. At 94 and 96 years old respectively, Paula and Juanita have shared the bond of sisterhood for almost 95 years! They have been close throughout the years, even as each had children and raised their respective families. They have both lived in San Diego since about 1950, and have lived together in the same house on Burgundy Street for the last 37 years. These days they both struggle with the affects of aging and need full time care, but their sibling bond remains as strong as ever. This third picture shows Juanita in the middle with her sister Paula on the right, and Paula's daughter Cindy on the left.

Rest In Peace Gloria. I received word from my cousin Paula Harrell Tuzzolino that her sister Gloria Harrell Watson, who died two years ago, will be laid to rest later this month in San Diego. On April 26 Gloria's ashes will be interred next to her Grandmother Nola Shannon Gower. At that time there will be a graveside service to honor Gloria. Any family members or friends are welcome to join us. For more details please contact me or Paula.

Darrell, Kellan, Mary and Rachel

Happy Birthday Rachel! Birthday wishes are extended to my niece Rachel Shepard who turns 31 years old this Saturday April 14. She is the daughter of my sibling Darrell Shepard, and lives in the Seattle, Washington area with her son Kellan. Best wishes to Rachel for a wonderful birthday!

This last picture was taken this past Easter and shows Rachel with her dad Darrell, her mom Mary and her son Kellan. And her friend the Easter Bunny.
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Steve Shepard

My Gower Grandfather, June 25, 2017

I have a lot of great memories,

but I can't imagine anything more exciting

than the life I live now.

~Rob Lowe

This month of June is the month of Father's Day, and brings to my mind a few important fellows in our family.

My Gower Grandfather. I am thinking first of all of my grandfather Leroy Ertin Gower (1899-1974), who was born in Timbo, Arkansas, 118 years ago today. Of my four grandparents, he died the youngest at age 75. He was a stern fellow who made a huge change in his life when he and his wife Nola moved from the little town of Okemah, Oklahoma to the city of San Diego, California in 1942. He was born and spent the first 25 years of his life in the hills of northern Arkansas, which was also the home of his wife Nola Shannon, and was where they were married in 1921.

Leroy M. "Babe" Gower and Daughter Vergie

He was named after his uncle Leroy Monroe "Babe" Gower who lived next door to his parents when Leroy was born, in the community of Sylamore, a few miles west of Mountain View, Arkansas. This first picture from about 1940, shows Leroy's namesake, his uncle Leroy "Babe" Gower, and Babe's special needs daughter Vergie Gower.

Leroy's oldest brother Alford Gower died at just 4 months old, 5 years before Leroy was born. The second child of the family, Leroy's older brother Lloyd W. Gower, died at just 18 years old in WWI when Leroy was just 15. Combine those experiences with the difficulty of making a living on the family farm in the early 20th century in Northern Arkansas, and you get an early life for Leroy that was hard and trying. It explains a lot about his stern demeanor, his serious approach to life and his simple lifestyle.

Leroy Ertin Gower

In the 1910 US Census, as a child of 10 years, Leroy was listed as a "farm laborer" and a "wage earner." He was also listed as "able to read and write," so it appears he had attended school for some (probably short) period of time in his early life. Even so, his life as a laborer and wage earner defined him from the time he was a boy. This second picture shows my grandfather Leroy Gower in work overalls (appropriately enough) probably in the 1930s.

When the family did move to California, Leroy came first in the summer of 1942, with son Hank and his young wife Starlene. Leroy had to come first to get work and be a wage earner before wife Nola and daughters Maida and Vicki could come to San Diego, which they did in December of that year.

The Gowers had been small time farmers in Stone County, Arkansas for several generations. Making the switch to life in Southern California was obviously a big change for them, a "sea change" in how they saw the world and approached life. Leroy and Nola did have their Baptist church connection which was one familiar thing for them during their transition to life in the city. There were some tough times as they settled into life in Southern California. A few years after they moved to San Diego their 15 year old daughter got pregnant, then became a teenage bride, an incident that created great strain on the family. But through it all they endured as Leroy and Nola made a good life for themselves on Lynne Street in what was then called East San Diego.

Leroy has a rich Gower heritage that stretches back nearly 4 centuries in North America. I have discovered that finding family links that reach into the early 19th century and occasionally into the 18th century is not difficult. My grandfather Gower's lineage, however, can be traced back to the early 17th century in Colonial America.

A key person in his lineage was Abell Gower (1640-1689), the first of our Gower ancestors to be born on American soil. Born in 1640 in the town of Henrico, Virginia near Richmond, he is the earliest American birth among all our known ancestors.

The year 1640 was 135 years prior to the Revolutionary War, long before the declaration of Independence and the creation of "The United States." In 1640 the total population of Colonial America was only 26,600. (1,500 times that number of people live today in California alone!)

He is described in The Encyclopedia of Virginia Biography (page 245) this way: "Gower, Abell was a justice of Henrico County, Virginia from 1679 till his death in 1689; sheriff in 1681, and a member of the house of burgesses in 1679. He married Jane, daughter of Edward Hatcher, of Henrico. He appears to have been a son of Abell Gower of Boulton, county Gloucester, England, esquire."

I am thankful for the life of my grandfather Leroy Gower and the rich and wonderful heritage we can claim because of him.

Joe Paul Harris (1950-2009). I am also thinking this month of my wife Cindy's brother Joe Paul Harris, who was born June 23, 1950. He spent his early life in San Diego before moving to Naknek, Alaska where he lived for about 20 years until he died in June, 2009. 

The accompanying picture shows Joe Paul at Christmas 2008 in San Diego, standing behind his mother Paula Harris, with his aunt Juanita Eeds on the left. His sister Cindy Shepard and nephew Nathan Shepard are on the right.

Kyle Sauvage. One other important June birthday to mention today: Kyle Sauvage, who will turn 12 years old tomorrow, June 26. Kyle is the younger son of James and Kelly Shepard Sauvage, and the grandson of Jackie Perry and my brother Gary Shepard. James lives with his parents and his brother Nate in Weatherford, Texas. 

This final picture, taken in March, shows Kyle Sauvage while at spring training in Arizona with a ball signed by San Diego Padres' Will Myers.
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Steve Shepard

"The Best Is Yet To Be", April 20, 2016

Grow old along with me!

The best is yet to be,

the last of life,

for which the first was made.

~Robert Browning

In my last post regarding Siblings Day I referred to my mom Maida and her sister Vicki. I said that with combined ages of 173, they were among the oldest siblings we have ever had in our family. I heard from two different people who shared with me some family data that helps to complete that picture.

Two More Senior Siblings of Note. My wife Cindy reminded me that her mom and sister, right here in San Diego, are 92 and 94 years old respectively, and have combined ages of 186. Cindy's mom Paula Harris and Paula's older sibling Juanita Eeds have lived in their house on Burgundy Street for close to 40 years. In 1957 Paula and her late husband Joe Harris first bought that home in the Allied Gardens community of San Diego. Next year Paula will celebrate 60 years living in that location. Congratulations to Paula and Juanita on being such good examples of healthy longevity within our family!

This first picture shows Paula and Juanita last August in San Diego on the occasion of Juanita's 94th birthday. Also in this picture are Cindy on the left and my sister Barbara on the right, who were celebrating Juanita's birthday with her.

I also mentioned in my last post that in February of 1999 my Great Uncle Lawrence was 101 and his sister, my Great Aunt Marjorie was 92. That year their combined ages were 193, which seemed to me the record setter for siblings anywhere in our extended family.

Setting the Sibling Record Straight. After that post I received word from cousin Carolyn Kilpatrick Roberts of Bolivar, Missouri. Her mother was Winona Davis Kilpatrick, sister of my Grandmother Bura Davis Shepard. Carolyn corrected the statement in my last post about Lawrence and Marjorie Davis being the oldest siblings ever in our extended family.

Carolyn: "You cited Aunt Marjorie and Uncle Lawrence but my mother Winona was older than Marjorie and was still living in 1999. She died in February of 1999 at the age of 95 so that, added to uncle Lawrence at 101, is 196 combined years."

So there you have it. 196 years for a single pair of siblings. It happened in 1999 in our family. Can anyone else find any other pair of siblings whose combined ages at any single point in history totaled more than 196?

This second picture is one I have not shared in this blog for a couple of years now. It is an absolute classic and one of the most amazing 100+ year old photos in our family history archives. It shows James Brooks Davis, his wife Callie and their 7 children. The children standing across the back are Winona, Myra, Bura and Lawrence. In the very middle is Jesse. The youngest ones in the front are Marjorie and Esther. This picture was taken in 1908 in Spencer, Indiana, 5 years before the family moved to Oklahoma.

A Unique Family. James Brooks Davis and his wife Callie Spear Davis were married in 1896 in Spencer, Indiana. In 1913 they packed up their family and migrated to Beaver County, Oklahoma where some of their descendants live to this day. They were healthy Hoosiers, simple farming folk, heartland Americans, whose simple lifestyle contributed to a wholesome family life. They were "dyed in the wool" Church people who honored family and cared for others. Both the Davis and Spear families from which James and Callie came were "Restoration Movement" Church people who had their roots in early 19th century Ohio.

We have other exemplary family circles among us, but this particular family unit -- all of whom are gone now -- is a special example. It is no wonder that two of their members, Lawrence and Winona, are the senior siblings ever in our family. With people living longer these days, their record will probably be broken one day - maybe in my lifetime. Even so, we will do well to remember with respect and admiration the family of James and Callie Davis. 
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Steve Shepard

Kiss Me I'm Irish! March 17, 2016

Kiss me and you will see how important I am.

~Sylvia Plath

Happy Saint Patrick's Day! As I have mentioned in this blog in the past, our family tree is loaded with Irish immigrants. I continue to add to the number of ancestors who came over from Ireland. Therefore this day and this post is an opportunity to celebrate our long, rich and illustrious Irish heritage.

A few weeks ago I included in this blog a post with a link to a YouTube slide show for Valentines Day. Unfortunately most of you were unable to view it, so I am including it again today in hopes that you can now view it after a few changes. The fact of the matter is that it may be as appropriate for St. Patrick's Day as it was for Valentine's Day.

Kiss Me, I'm Irish! I've titled the following slide show "Kiss Me I'm Irish" for reasons that will be obvious when you see it. You will see wedding day kisses, pecks on the cheek, baby smooches and some other crazy kisses that reflect well this diverse, oddball family to which we all belong. The pictures are of kids and adults, young parents and older lovers, wedding moments, birthday celebrations and everything in between. Each picture includes at least one member of our extended family. How many of these folks can you identify?

Enjoy this homage to love within our family, set to the music of k.d. lang -- herself of Irish ancestry -- singing a contemporary cover of an old classic. 




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Steve Shepard

"Days of Auld Lang Syne", December 31, 2015

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,

and never brought to mind?

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,

and auld lang syne?

~Robert Burns

Best wishes to all of you for a wonderful new year! May 2016 bring much happiness, personal growth, and great joy.

Happy Anniversary Darrell and Mary. Happy 33rd Wedding Anniversary today, December 31, to my brother Darrell Shepard and his wife Mary Medina Shepard of Bothell, Washington. They were married in Abilene, Texas while students at Abilene Christian University. In the last third of a century their family has grown to a clan of 12 including three children and 4 grandchildren, all of whom live near them in the Seattle area. Happy Anniversary to Darrell and Mary, and best wishes for many more years to come!

This first picture shows Darrell and Mary with me on the right, in late 1983, just before they celebrated their first wedding anniversary. It was taken in Abilene, Texas where they were living at the time.

Remembering James and Callie Davis. Tomorrow is the wedding anniversary of my great grandparents James Brooks Davis and his wife Callie Spear Davis. They were married in Owen County, Indiana on New Year's Day, 120 years ago. Their decision to marry on the first day of the new year was understandable. A new year, a new marriage, a new beginning; it all fit together. For farming families it was also a slow time of the year work-wise. And if the weather was not too bad, family and friends from all around would be available to celebrate with them.

Their new year's day marriage so impressed their youngest daughter Marjorie Davis Millikan that she too decided to marry on that day. And not once, but twice! First in 1931 to John Millikan, the father of her children, and then 50 years later to Clyde Williams in 1981.

This second picture was taken in 1908, just a few months after their youngest child, Marjorie Davis, was born in Spencer, Indiana, and just a few years before the family moved to Beaver County, Oklahoma. This picture shows parents James and Callie Davis with baby Marjorie.

Happy Birthday Chenda! New Year's Day is also the birthday of our daughter-in-law Chenda Sou Shepard. She was born in Phnom Penh, Cambodia on the first day of 1980. She lives in San Diego with husband Nathan Shepard and their three children Preslea, Logan and William.

This third picture was taken just last week on Christmas Day in San Diego at the home of Cindy's mom Paula Harris. Chenda is on the left holding their youngest child William Shepard. Next to Chenda in the back are Logan with Nathan, Cindy, her mom Paula and me on the far right. In front are Cindy's aunt Juanita Eeds with Preslea in front of her.
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Steve Shepard

Summer Family Fun! September 16, 2015

Spare the rod and spoil the child – that is true.

But, beside the rod, keep an apple

to give him when he has done well.

~Martin Luther

Greeting to all of you from San Francisco where Cindy and I find ourselves today. Summer is drawing to a close! Vacations are almost over, schools have begun, and life for most of us has settled into a sense of normalcy that comes with the end of summer.

As I threatened several weeks ago I have put together a slideshow of various summer activities in the lives of our family members. It includes a whole host of summer events, from a family reunion to beach vacations, from memorable visits to scenic locations to kids activities and birthday celebrations. It includes children and seniors, Gowers and Shepards and all those related to them, as well as activities in various places around the country.

Thanks to those of you who emailed me pictures of your family's summer activities. Thanks also to those of you generous enough to make pictures of your summer activities available on Facebook. It clearly was a busy, enjoyable and event filled summer.

So here it is... this summer's capsulation of fun in our family far and near.





This slideshow should be easier to view than those I have included in the past. This one is viewable on any device you chose: desktop, mobile phone, or tablet. If you do have any problems seeing it I would appreciate it if you would let me know. Enjoy!
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Steve Shepard

A Family Is What You Make It, January 7, 2015

A family is what you make it.

It is made strong,

not by the number of heads

counted at the dinner table,

but by the rituals

you help family members create,

and by the memories you share.

~Marge Kennedy

This week three birthdays occur in our larger family, all of which are for people who are descended from William and Bura Davis Shepard, or have married into that family.

Happy Birthday Carsyn Slaughter! Monday of this week, January 5, was the second birthday of Carsyn Slaughter, the great granddaughter of Thelma Shepard Boyd. Carsyn is the daughter of Courtney Boyd and Cody Slaughter of San Diego, and the granddaughter of Darren Boyd of Coronado, California.

The first picture shows little Carsyn being held by her mother Courtney Boyd, with her great grandmother Thelma on the left and aunt Kim Boyd Clark on the right. This picture was taken last month when Thelma's family was all together in San Diego for Christmas.

Happy Birthday Cindy Shepard! Today, January 7, is the birthday of my wife Cindy Harris Shepard, with whom I have the great privilege of living, here in San Diego. Cindy was born in the San Joaquin Valley town of Visalia, California but came as a young child with her family to San Diego where she was raised.

This second picture is one of my favorites and shows Cindy as a child with her father Joe Harris (1922-1999). It was taken about 1950 when she was 2 or 3 years old, possibly in the San Joaquin Valley near where the Harrises lived.

Cindy and I actually met 50 years ago this year (no, that can't be right; I need a fact checker!). At the time we were in our senior year in High School -- hers was Hoover High and mine was Kearny High. We got acquainted through our involvement in our Church youth groups -- hers was the Allied Gardens Church of Christ, and mine was the Linda Vista Church of Christ. Our youth groups co-mingled often for outings, Bible studies, and numerous other activities. 

The result was a few marriages (like ours), and many friendships that have endured through the decades. Several of our friends from all those years ago are Facebook friends even today, including Mel Storm, Frank Hankins, Ron Storm, Connie Shaw Cleland, Linda Cranford Elliot, Jennifer Daniels McGoldrick, Tom Skinner, and Jane Saxton Harris.

These days Cindy enjoys the retired life and relishes being an active grandmother of 3 little ones. She also finds time to be of assistance to her mother and aunt, nonagenarians who live in Allied Gardens not far from where we live here in the San Carlos Community of San Diego.

This third picture shows Cindy with her granddaughter Preslea, who is the oldest of the three rug rats. This picture was taken a few months ago at the home of Preslea's parents Nathan and Chenda Sou Shepard.

Happy Birthday, Mary Shepard! This Saturday, January 10 is the birthday of Mary Medina Shepard, wife of my brother Darrell Shepard. She and Darrell live in Kirkland, Washington and are the parents of 3 grown kids and the grandparents of 3 little ones, all of whom live in the Seattle area. Mary is originally from Chicago but met Darrell at Abilene Christian in Abilene, Texas. They have lived in the Great Northwest now for most of their lives.

The fourth picture is one I snatched off of Facebook recently and shows proud mom and grandmother Mary on the right with daughter Rachel and Rachel's son Kellan Shepard, grandson #2 of Mary and Darrell.

Best wishes to these three for memorable and joyful birthdays!
- - -
Steve Shepard

Thanks for Family Past and Present! November 20, 2014

Let us be grateful

to the people who make us happy;

they are the charming gardeners

who make our souls blossom.

~Marcel Proust

On this week before Thanksgiving, I find myself very grateful for the family that Cindy and I have, in a special way for our son Nathan, his wife Chenda, and their children Preslea, Logan and William. I am also grateful for my siblings and their families and for our wonderful mother Maida Shepard, whose 90th birthday we joyfully celebrated earlier this month.

I am also grateful for babies who were born into our family this year: Kellan Shepard, son of Rachel Shepard and Brian Miller of Kirkland, Washington; and Karver Bearden, son of Lyndsey Aquiningoc and Colton Bearden. The picture shows recent images of Kellan (left) and Karver.

Furthermore, I am grateful for people who married into our family this year, in particular Justin Davis of Blue Springs, Mo. (husband of Amanda Ortiz), and Dee Shannon of Dixon, California (wife of Joan Shepard).

My gratitude also extends to the life Sou Penh of Kampong Speu, Cambodia, who died this year. He was the father of our daughter in law Chenda Shepard. He was known to only a few of us, but will always have a place in the hearts of Chenda and those of us who had met him, and his grandchildren, who never had the privilege of meeting him.

One of the unexpected benefits of doing family research is discovering ancestors who sacrificed so much during their lives, often in ways that contributed to the quality of life that we live yet today.

I am thinking in particular about the growing list of soldier ancestors who served in the various wars of our country, from the Revolutionary War, to the Civil War and conflicts of the 20th Century.

The second picture shows Eugene Shepard and brother Elmer Shepard who served during World War II. With them in this picture are the only 3 children that were in the Shepard family in February, 1945 at the time of this picture: their sister Thelma Shepard, and their niece and nephew Beverly Russell and Rex Russell.

All the following soldiers I have written about in the posts of this blog over the last few years. They are all persons to whom we owe a great debt of gratitude, not only as Thanksgiving 2014 approaches, but always. Those with asterisks by their names died in the service of their country.

Revolutionary War:

• Marmaduke Davis (1760-1855) 
• Andrew Pickens (1739-1817)
• Robert McKnight (1732-1818)

War of 1812:

• *John Williams Sr. (1782-1813)

Civil War:

• *William Shepard (1835-1862)
• *David Reid Shannon (1821-1864)
• Jackson William Gower (1831-1902)
• Gus Dearien (1814-1900)

World War I:

• *Lloyd W. Gower (1896-1918)
• Benjamin Davis (1888-1963)

World War II:

• Elmer Shepard (1918-2012)
• Gene Shepard (1921-2003)
• Beryl Swinney Shepard (1923-1994)
• Paula Harris (b. 1923)
• Juanita Eeds (b. 1921)

For the dedication and sacrifice of the foregoing, our hearts are filled with gratitude. A prayer this coming week in thankfulness for their lives would be most appropriate.
- - -
Steve Shepard

Each Family's Story, October 10, 2014

In each family a story is playing itself out,

and each family's story

embodies its hope and despair.

~Auguste Napier

Greetings to all of you once again from the beautiful South American country of Peru! Today we are in the ancient Inca town of Ollantaytambo in southern Peru, as we draw ever nearer to Machu Picchu, one of the great wonders of the world.

The first picture shows Cindy and me a few days ago when we visited the sacred Saqsaywaman ("sexy woman" is a close pronunciation) Incan Ruins and "The Temple of the Sun", above the city of Cusco, Peru.

Our Hoosier Roots. 145 years ago two of the most important people in our Davis heritage were married. On October 10, 1869 Charles Edward Davis and Malinda Wright tied the knot in Owen County, Indiana. Charles and Malinda were the grandparents of my paternal grandmother Bura Davis Shepard. 

Charles was one of the last of our Davis ancestors to be born in Ohio. Born in 1849, his parents Alexander and Jane Buskirk Davis, when they were about 30 years old, moved their small family from Adams in Monroe County, Ohio to Spencer, Indiana in the early 1850s. Before the Davises got there, the family of Malinda Wright had already settled in Indiana, which is where Malinda was born. Charles and Malinda met in the 1860s and were married in the fall of 1869.

Much of what we know about Charles and Malinda Davis in the 19th Century is because of the records of their church, the New Union Church of Christ near Spencer, Indiana. They and many of their relatives were active participants and founders of that congregation out on Rattlesnake Creek. Among the most important records is the baptism record of their granddaughter (my grandmother) Bura Emerald Davis in 1906.

Unfortunately I do not have a picture of Great Great Grandmother Malinda Wright Davis. The only picture I have of Charles Edward Davis is this second picture. It was probably taken sometime in the 1920s, after Malinda had died. It shows the widower Charles Edward Davis late in his life with a cane and a white beard. On the left is Charles and Malinda's firstborn James Brooks Davis, and on the right is another one of their 7 children, John Emery Davis.

Charles and his family were trailblazers in many ways. Simply getting from Eastern Ohio to Southern Indiana in the 1850s (with a couple of children!) took great stamina and fortitude. Indiana was still frontier to a great extent in these pre-Civil War years, and establishing a place to live took hard work. By the end of the 19th Century many of our Davis ancestors began to move westward to Oklahoma. The 1910 US Census shows Charles and Malinda living in Logan, in Beaver County, Oklahoma. They are both laid to rest in Beaver County.

Because of Charles and Malinda, we have deep roots in Ohio, Indiana and Okla- homa that will always be reminders of the kind of people we have come from. 21st Century America is, of course, far removed from life in the 19th Century mid-west, but we will always be connected to these pioneers and have a strong bond with them.

Scary Days Ahead. Halloween is just a few weeks away, and again this year I plan to put together a slide show of family halloween pictures. If you have a recent or old halloween picture, of a youngster or an oldster, that you would like for me to include, please send it my way.
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Steve Shepard

A 45th Anniversary, Dec 27, 2013

We are not the same persons
 this year as last;

nor are those we love.

It is a happy chance
 if we, changing,

continue to love a changed person.

~W. Somerset Maugham 

It is hard for me to believe that today is the 45th wedding anniversary of Cindy and me. It was in 1968 on this December day, which also happened to be on Friday, that Cindy and I were married at the La Mesa Church of Christ here in the San Diego area. It was an evening wedding, officiated by my second cousin Edwin Kilpatrick, who was also the minister of my family's church, the Linda Vista Church of Christ.

Among those in the wedding party all those years ago were Gloria Weston, Pam Henderson, Connie Cleland, my sister Linda, my brother Gary, the Deveny twins, Dan Frost, and Cindy's brother Joe Paul. The wedding was attended by a large number of our family and friends.

I was home on Christmas break from college at Abilene Christian in order for us to get married. After the wedding we took a few days and went up the California coast for a quiet honeymoon that was a welcome rest after all the hectic preparations for the wedding (most of which I was able to avoid!). Within a few days we returned to Texas for school where we both continued our studies for another year and a half before returning to California. Our first home together was a small apartment across the street from the College. The memories of that time, though they grow faint, still fill us with warmth and joy.

The first picture (above) shows the two of us. The left half of the image was taken 45 years ago on our wedding night; the right half was taken just last month while we were on vacation in Kona, Hawaii. The right half of this picture was taken by my mom Maida Shepard, the same person who had to "sign for me" when we got our marriage license all those years ago. Cindy and I were both 20 at the time but an archaic California law stated that men were underage at 20 while women were not.

That Was Then; This Is Now. Tonight we plan to leave all our house guests to fend for themselves and have dinner somewhere here in San Diego at a nice restaurant as we celebrate our years together.

The second picture was taken this past Thanksgiving and shows Cindy and me with our son Nathan, his wife Chenda and their children William, Preslea and Logan. On the left are Cindy's aunt Juanita Eeds and Cindy's mom Paula Harris.
- - -
Steve

Happy Halloween Tomorrow! October 31, 2013

Life's no fun
without a good scare.
~Danny Elfman

Happy Spooky Day tomorrow! Even here on our Cruise people are getting into the Holloween Spirit with costumes and other holiday activities.

Happy Birthday Pam! Yester- day, October 30, was the birthday of Pam Engan Shepard who has lived all her 40-something years in Anacortes, Washington. Pam is the mother of Steven and Linda Shepard. Best wishes to Pam and many happy returns of the day!

The first picture shows Pam (second from right) with Russ and their children Linda and Steven. This picture was taken this past summer at the Shepard family reunion in Anacortes, Washington.

Mom's Birthday. Tomorrow is the birthday of my mother Maida Shepard of Anacortes, Washington. It is hard to believe that she has lived in Washington State for over 35 years now! In 1978 she and husband Eugene moved to Anacortes from San Diego where they raised their 6 children. 

Maida is celebrating Halloween, as well as her birthday, by taking a Hawaiian cruise with me and Cindy and Cindy's mom Paula Harris. So far it has been a wonderful adventure and the four of us look forward to the rest of our journey at sea.

The second picture was taken this past summer and shows Maida giving her great grandson Logan A. Shepard a computer lesson. Look closely in her eyes and you can see what sophisticated lesson she is teaching him.

Happy Halloween! In celebration of our strange family on this strangest of American holidays, the following photo presentation is offered. It shows many of our our older and younger family members from various locations around the country, in Halloween costumes and other holiday poses. Some of these pictures are recent and others from many years ago. 

"This is Halloween..."

  

- - -
Steve Shepard

Veteran's Day, Nov 11

You can kiss your family good-bye
and put miles between you,
but you carry them with you in your heart,
because you do not just live in a world
but a world lives in you.

~Frederick Buechner

Hello Family and Friends,

Greetings to all of you, wherever you may be, from San Francisco, California where Cindy and I are once again on the move.

Today is Veteran's Day. I am thinking today about two of my favorite Vets, my dad Eugene Shepard (1921-2003) and my uncle Elmer Shepard, both of whom served during World War II. (See the first picture of these two veterans with a serviceman buddy of theirs in San Diego about 1943.)

Other relatives who served their country during WW2 include Elmer's wife Beryl Swinney Shepard, and my wife Cindy's father AND mother, Joe and Paula Harris. (The picture below, taken in the early 1940s, shows Paula on the right next to her sister Juanita Eeds, both of whom served in the Women's Army Corp during WW2. They live in San Diego today.)

The more I research our family, the more I learn about other relatives who served their country, and in some instances lost their lives as a result. 

I have written numerous times in this blog about my GGgrandfather William Shepard (1835-1862) who died in the American Civil War and who is buried with other Veterans in Evansville, Indiana. His death in 1862 from injuries suffered in battle is the very reason I can find no information about any of our Shepard ancestors before him. He did not live long enough to meet his son, much less give him information about his ancestry. 

It is a genealogical black chasm that I have been unable to bridge. You would think that his military service would have resulted in records in our National Archives. But search as I might, I have found nothing that tells me anything substantive about his parents, or even his wife. I have found a few unsubstantiated leads, but nothing that can be verified. At least not yet.

On the other hand, I have discovered other ancestors who have served their country in generations past and information about them and their progenitors. People like Edmond Owens (1795-1864) a "Tennessee Volunteer" in the war of 1812, Robert Columbus Shannon (1893-1923) and Benjamin Harrison Davis (1888-1963) in WW1, Captain Abell Gower (1640-1689) in the Indian wars, Andrew Pickens (1753-1844) and Marmaduke Davis (1760-1855) in the Revolutionary War. (By the way, in my next post I plan to share some interesting new information that I have come across regarding Marmaduke Davis.) 

One can add to the foregoing list those of more recent generations who have served in the military, like Terry Kilpatrick (1945-1968), Darren Boyd, Jimmie Gower, Michael Harrell, Cindy's brother Joe Paul Harris (1950-2009), and others I have not mentioned.

All these Veterans are part of the world that lives in us, and we are truly grateful.
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Steve

Only the Good Die Young

Only the good die young.
~old saying

Dear Shepard Family and Friends,

If the old saying is true that "Only the good die young", then we have had some very good people in our family. Among them would be Manuel Aquiningoc, a young man of Guamanian descent, who married into our family in 1990.

18 years ago this month, at the age of 30, Manuel died in San Diego. Today would have been his 49th birthday. The tragedy began when he was arrested one evening at his home. The next morning he was found dead in his jail cell. He left behind a young wife, Kerri Shepard Aquiningoc, a 1 year old daughter Lyndsey, and another child on the way, who would be named Mandi. (The picture above shows Manuel, Kerri and baby Lyndsey in 1992.) Manuel's death was a tragedy, and a blow to his family that was very difficult to deal with, especially by those closest to him.

Like many people in our family who have found themselves having to deal with a tragic situation, Kerri, Lyndsey and Mandi have done their best to make the most of life in the last 18 years. Their most recent celebration was Mandi's graduation from High School last month. The picture below, taken last month, shows Lyndsey and Mandi Aquiningoc with their Shepard grandfather Gary.

The fact of the matter is that our family has had to endure other very difficult deaths of young folks. In the 1970s we endured the deaths of Linda Shepard (20) and Bev Russell (35), and then later in the 1990s, the death of Karl Wilk (27) -- 2 grandchildren and a Ggrandchild of Will and Bura Shepard. Also in the 1970s my wife Cindy endured the untimely deaths of two of her cousins in their 20s, Gloria and Chuck Eeds. Whenever a young person's life is cut short, it is especially painful.

Other young members of our family have died in generations past. Their deaths must have hurt their loved ones as much as those that we have experienced. 

• In 1862 my GGgrandfather William Shepard died at 27 in the Civil War, leaving a wife and an infant child. 
• In 1863 Caroline Williams Spear, my GGgrandfather Spear's first wife, died at 23 in childbirth and left a daughter. 
• Then in 1861 there was the apparent murder of my GGgrandmother Roena Norton when she was just a teenager. It happened at the hands of her stepfather, who had molested her first.

These episodes in our family history are not easy to write about. Some of them are shocking, others are heartbreaking. But they are all part of the story of who we are. They remind us of how fragile and difficult life can be. But most of all they help us see that the most important thing is not what life gives us, but what we make of it. It is heartwarming to see that Kerri and Lyndsey and Mandi are making the most of theirs.
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Steve